Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Gesticulation

With the recent rise of interactions between other races and Blacks - it seems that many people are confused with the proper way to greet and interact with Black people.
Pumping ones fist in excitement, a la Arsenio Hall, is permitted - but do it right.
The motion is a forward throwing motion - not a reversed motion as though one is reeling in a fish.
Forward = excitement or approval
Backwards = reeling in a fish.
Got it?
Good.
Now the next pointer.

The Man Hug is permitted for those with whom you have developed a close relationship.
But it isn't really a hug at all.
Hugging a man is wrong.
(*Unless you go that way - then, that's your business.)

The proper man hug is really a hand shake that is amplified by a quick shoulder bump followed by a quick verbal expression of joy at having run into a brotha'.
(*No caress is involved.)

Don't try to keep up with the latest and coolest hand shakes.
The traditional European Handshake is acceptable,
because we know that you are white.
Any attempt at an ethnic variation will probably be viewed as pandering.
(When all else fails - stick to what you know.)


This has been a public service to those who are now forced to interact with those of a different culture.
Please return to and enjoy your previously scheduled entertainment.

3 comments:

Freeman said...

Also, WARNING WARNING WARNING! When you see a Black guy don't call us BRO! I am not from your tribe and I consider it to be a insult as it's aka hey Black guy! You might get a Hey Whitey response from me and you didn't mean it that way!

Stick to saying MAN as that's neutral. Ish how about just be you and stop trying to connect with folks through fake understanding and hand gestures!

brohammas said...

I'm all about the terrorist fist jab. It lets "them" know how down I am.

FreeMan said...

LOL@Brohammas - This guy tried to fist jab me and I told him when white people start doing it most blacks stop. He looked at me funny but I couldn't stop laughing!

The High Five, the Cabbage Patch, the Who Let the Dogs out and Whoot there it is have made me want to ban anything that is a means of greeting and celebration.