Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Golf?

Okay...,
I'm done.
So Tiger Woods effed a bunch of Ho's outside of his marriage?
Would I do the same?
Nope.
But That's why I'm not married.
(I'm still a bit of a Ho.)

But I'm not interested in his personal life.
What is interesting to me is his financial life.
Will his endorsements with Nike, Buick, Gillette, EA Sports or Gatorade vanish as quickly as those of Michael Vick or OJ Simpson?
The short answer is, "no".

Tiger is an anomaly.
He sells a wholesome image in a presumably wholesome sport to an unwholesome society.
Tiger is "The" cash cow for the sport's governing entity.
No one was talking about golf, and fewer were playing golf, before Tiger took to the tee boxes of the PGA tour.
In fact (Judging by tour television ratings with Tiger in contention as opposed to tournaments in which he doesn't even play.) - Tiger is the PGA.
Tiger is to golf what Oprah is to daytime television.

Nike - This endorsement deal is safe.
Did Nike stop producing Brand Jordan after any of his scandals?
Nope.
Jordan was the brand.
The same could be said of Tiger and his TW line and it's effect on overall Nike Golf sales.

Buick - The line was seen as as old as it's buyers before Tiger.
No one but grandmothers bought the brand before Tiger.
Tiger injected a more youthful appeal to the brand's image.
Now, parent company GM could switch Tiger to it's Cadillac brand and sell him as being a pimp in the stereotypical pimp ride.

Gillette - Tiger must have been smooth to get all of those ho's.
Maybe it was the smooth shave provided by the brand's razors that did the trick.

Tag Heuer - Tiger had to be able to manage his time to keep track of all these women.
Maybe Tag enabled him to do so in a more efficient manner.

Gatorade - Along with Derek Jeter, Peyton Manning, Mia Hamm and Michael Jordan as those who endorse the product - one's personal life doesn't seem as important as one's professional life.
As long as Tiger wins - he has a value to Pepsi Co. as a pitchman.
And with his own brand of sports drink for the company - his value is increased.
Who knows, maybe he took a swig after every conquest.

EA Sports - Golf is a lazy man's sport.
The only "athletes" more lazy are video gamers.
Without Tiger, who would need to play a lazy man's sport in a more lazy medium?

With pundits speculating whether Elin will stay with Tiger, one only has to consider her reasoning behind her marriage to Eldrick.
Maybe she loved him.
Maybe she saw the millions he could make and decided to sign a long term deal to join "Team Tiger".
Judging by her recently discussed contract extension (reworked pre-nup) - maybe she used a sports agent instead of a divorce lawyer.

Is Tiger a good man?
I don't know.
But he is one hell of a businessman.

5 comments:

Citizen Ojo said...

Gatorade just announced they are discontinuing his brand of drink. I never had it but I heard it taste like porn star sweat and crab grass.

CareyCarey said...

Come on Uncle Black, you a ho...nawl?

Hey, that was some slick shit.

If Gatorade did drop his drink, it's probably because no one was buying the shit so this is another way fro them to make money by throwing his ass under the bus. And to get out of the contract.

If you ever decide to stop being a ho, you could probably find a job as a pitch man.

uglyblackjohn said...

As soon as I posted this I saw the story of him being dropped.
But no need to amend the story - I'm wrong A LOT.

doll said...

When he played recently in my home town the letters to the paper were all about what a marvellous role model he was. I think that is why it is so disappointing to hear about the extent of his inability to keep his pants zipped up.

Also if he gave in to lust in such a big way and his publicity machine kept it covered up what other failures of morality have they hidden from us.

uglyblackjohn said...

@ doll - ALL men have faults.
Great men have great faults.
(Not to say that Tiger is great. Just that he is (was) perceived as such.)