Tuesday, January 17, 2012


I had a stepfather who would flap his arms whenever he would dream that he was flying.
I discovered this because I walked into his house just as he was having what looked to be a seizure.
When I awakened him, "I was flying", he replied when I enquired of his well being.
His idea of human flight was almost logical and therefore modeled after birds.
My idea was based on faith more than physics so being able to fly like Superman was just a given.
I used to be able to fly without even thinking about it.
I could rarely control my speed nor altitude so it was almost always a harrowing experience.
I've dreamt of flying so many times that I've almost perfected the landing.
I don't mind flight, it's a handy tool in times of need.

Lately, the ability to fly seems to have gone from me.
I now have to focus a great deal just to be able to hover.
I'm not sure if I'm even built for high places - I'm a regular guy.
At a recent social event, I was nicknamed "King John" by some of these men and women with titles and/or status.
When I asked why they would call me by that title, "Because you're so good at working people to get what you desire. Everyone loves you, and even your enemies come to serve you", they answered.
"There is none good but God.", I replied.

Maybe I'm so accustomed to being the outsider or underdog that I cannot see myself as being a part of a larger group?
Maybe I don't believe the hyperbole but instead choose to remain one of the people?
Maybe I have low self-esteem?
I really don't know why but being called "King John" by those who supposedly wield some type of power is discomforting to me.
Maybe, like Icarus, I've learned my lesson about the dangers of flying too high or swooping in too low.

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