Saturday, September 25, 2010
Sure, she may color or perm her hair.
(But she is not ashamed of wearing her hair in it's natural style either.)
Her name may even be considered 'ghetto'.
(But she defines her being, not her name.)
She may be too dark for some.
(But why should she be ashamed of her real color?)
She may work in an industry which promotes style and image.
(But I have yet to see her in blue or green contacts.)
At six feet tall - she may even be considered to be too tall for some men.
(But she is not masculine.)
It centered around a disagreement between two white women, each of whom is dating a Black man, at a popular Black site.
(Hint; Just because you may occasionally have someone Black in you - that doesn't mean that you automatically have some Black in you.)
It was a real 'Battle of the Beckies'.
As the least attractive of the two (Becky2) began to tell the other Becky (Becky1) that B1 was wrong for assuming that she (B1) was special because she was white - I questioned B2 about what was wrong with thinking this way.
I explained that I think that I'm special because I am Black - why shouldn't a white person feel that she is special because she is white?
Becky2 said that having a sense of pride in ones heritage was different than feeling special because of ones race.
But why did Becky2 assume that I was just saying this in an effort to make myself feel good?
Why did Becky2 equate this sentiment with having to convince myself of something which was not true?
Why is having pride in being a minority different than having pride in oneself if they are white?
Is it the same thing as a mother telling her homely daughter, "They just don't like you because they are jealous'?
Is it seen (even by many Black people) as just a silly self-affirmation practiced by those with little self esteem?
In my previous post, I mentioned that I have a hard time finding a "Real Black Woman".
(And this is partially true.)
As I sometimes run night clubs, I meet a lot of ghetto assed hood rats who don't understand why I duck when they try to throw some punani my way.
"Oh, you can't handle a RBW/SBW.", is the most common reply to my very polite, "No, thank you.".
A 'real' Black woman being said by someone with green contacts, a red weave and Mac make up the shade of which should be on the face of Gweneth Paltrow?
A 'real' Black woman who is afraid of other Black people?
A 'real' Black woman who puts her desires above the needs of her family and community?
A 'real' Black woman who bought into all of the current Western philosophies instead of remembering the truths taught by our elders?
A 'real' Black woman who understands that money is not the goal, that it is only a tool to get that which is really important.
A 'real' Black woman who is so heavily invested in a non-Black culture that her only compliant is that she is not recognized as equal in a culture created to suppress her?
So yes, I am looking for a woman who understands that she is special because is Black - not in spite of it.
Why should I value someone who really doesn't even really value herself?